ELLA's Teddy Program

I was of one the "lucky" ones...
Compared to others in my situation...

You see, I was "fortunate"...
For the fact that because Ella lived...
Almost 8 months...
I did not go home empty-handed...

Although I did go home an orphaned mom...

I was "fortunate" enough...
To have almost 8 months...
Of teddy bears...
Clothes...
Books...
Pictures..
Videos...
Music...
And other toys...

Which when panic strikes...
Keep me for going insane...

I have a little bit of Ella's life...
With me...
In my heart...
In her room...
All over my house...

But not everyone has this "chance"...
And so, when I heard...
Of this program existing in Australia...
I knew I what I had to do...

It is a simple gesture...
A teddy bear...
The basic and yet ultimate...
Newborn's gift...

Almost everyone receives...
At least one as a gift...
When a child is born...
Or even before the miracle of life...
Begins...

Ella did...
Flocon Flake...
A cuddly polar bear teddy...
From her auntie A...

And as a child earn his or hers wings...
Whether at home...
In a hospital neonatal unit...
In a hospice...

Whether that child is...
2 minutes old..
3 weeks old...
6 years old...
Or 18 years old...

As a parent is left orphaned...
The comfort of a teddy bear...

A King Louie monkey...
A pink Hungry For Love hippo....
Or an ICU The Cat stuffie...

Is all you need...

To get you through THE moment...

The moment where the ground...
Opens up from under your feet...

The moment that panic sets in...
At the abberation of your loss...

The moment that you...
Once again realize...

That this IS it...

ELLA's Teddy Program...
Is just that...

A way to pay it forward...
Another mean to help myself...

By getting someone else as well...
Through THE moment...

Because I am "fortunate"...

And because I know...
How a teddy bear...
And a piece of my angel...
Gets me through my days...

And my nights...

Long live ELLA's teddy program...
Long live the memory of Ella...
And every other angel...
Being honoured...

As new teddy bears...
And carefully chosen small angel ornaments...
Will be offerred...
To bereaved parents...
On their behalf...

ELLA - Everyone Loves Little Angels

Gratitude on August 1st, 2010

Someone who recently came into my life...
Told me today...
You cannot have gratitude without grief...
And you cannot experience grief without gratitude...

I could not agree more...

Today...
Just like yesterday...
I am grateful...

I am grateful for many...
Many people...
Many moments...
Many memories...

I am grateful for one...
One angel...
One love...
One life...

Today, and everyday, I do...
Count my blessings...
And express...
My gratitude...

But not until today...
Did I make it this public...

And so it goes...

Today I am grateful for the sun...
The warmth...
The peace I felt...
After a good cry...
By my daughter's grave...

Today I am grateful...
For my mom...
And my dad...
For my sister...
My brother...
Their spouses...
And chidlren...

Today I am grateful...
To have held a sweet baby boy...
Heard him laugh...
Seen him play...

Today I am grateful...
For friends who know...
Just how to lend an ear...
And bring back my waivering faith...
To show me that I am strong...

Today I am grateful...
Fo strangers who show support...
By joining in a cause...
And paying it forward...

Today, I am grateful for my amazing friend Yvonne...
And her husband Bart Bridge...
And for Wanda and Ivan Ravnic...
For Deborah Power-Demille...
And Francesca Benedetti...
And Deby Gulleckson...
And for Arlene and Dwaine Bridge...
All of whom kindly donated in memory of Ella...

Today, I am grateful...
For Nikki, on the other side of the world...
Who's encouraging words always...
Lift me up...

Today, I am grateful for Helene and the crew at Yogacara...
For Simone and the team at Solarice Spa...
Both of whom are offering their services...
To raise funds for BC Children's Hospital...

I am grateful for my friend Jennifer Terzi in Ottawa...
and for my friend Marie-Paule Dupont in Gatineau...
Who not only support me from afar...
But generously donate in memory of my girl...

Today I am grateful...
For so many wonderful people...
Who give me the strength...
To see another day...


ELLA - Everyone Loves Little Angels

It Only Takes One...

It only takes one...
Big heart...

It only takes one...
Kind soul...

To make a difference...
And brighten...
Someone else's day...

It can come in the form of a smile...
A gentle hand on your back...

It may show up when you least expect it...
From someone you don't know...
Someone who understands your fears....
And shares your pain...

It may be handed out
As a strength coin...
Because it is clear...
You need it...

Or as a hug without a need for words...
To catch you as you spin...
After having the wind knocked out of you...

It will surprise you...
And bring you to tears...
While filling your heart...
With hope...
And a sense of joy...

It can come from your family...
Your friends...

From a complete stranger in the street...
Or from another from across the world...
From a group with common misfortunes...
Or another who just wants to help...

It can materialize...
As one who finds himself...
Facing a similar faith...

It can be done in person...
Or by phone...
By email...
Or through social and traditional media...

It may be monetery...
It may be wordy...

But it is always done...
With purpose...

I was fortunate...
To come across...
The path...
Of one big heart...
The path...
Of one kind soul...

And so...

ELLA...
Everyone Loves Little Angels...
Was born...

Out of my loss...
To fight my grief...

To give a sense...
To my baby being taken from me...

To ensure...
Ella did not die in vain...

To keep her alive...
In the hearts of those...
She touches with her story...
Daily...

To pay it forward...
And bring support...
Maybe some peace...
Onto others...

As it had been done...
For Ella and for me...

It only takes...
One simple gesture...

From you...
From me...

To help sick kids...
And their families...
ELLA's Foundation will one day be...

To support bereaved parents...
ELLA's Wings...
Spread large and wide...

To manage symptoms...
Improve quality of life...
And maybe one day...
Find a cure...
ELLA's Hope...
Is that of those facing rare diseases...

But specifically...
It only takes one...
To restore hope to many...

Ella's Hope...
To eradicate...
One rare disease...

The rare disease...
That took you away from me...

ELLA - Everyone Loves Little Angels